You Crazy Dreamers

Finally my dear friend Olivier (which you can count me in on one of those fingers) has decided to write about this extraordinary singer. It’s been months now since I was introduced to Colby and I’ve often asked Olly why he hasn’t written about him or introduced him to the rest of the readers. I too understand his reasoning, we often come across people who we become friends with and the music then transcends into something different. It’s because we’ve gotten to know them on a personal/intimate level that the soul of that person comes before the music. It is like that for me with The Guggenheim Grotto and so it is for Olly with Colby. I love his music and have been listening to his tunes for a while now. So without much further ado I hope you will take the time to read this interview and get to know Colby as a person, artist, and friend.

Artist : Colby Stead
Where to buy : Artist’s website / cdbaby.com
Label : Thoughtfull

Ante ‘Trans’ Scriptum : What should have been said about Me (Olivier).
Most of the time I’m using the internet to expand my horizons, not only on a professional level, since my profession is website designer/programming but on a personal level to keep my eyes wide open, open on the political forecast, weather forecast, on fashion, and of course on music but also on me. If couple years back someone would have told me that I would be calling someone I met on the internet a friend : I surely would have laughed. First, because I’m not friendly at all and because I’ve got so few friends as I’ve got fingers on my two hands. I mean friends I can trust as I trust my own hands ! Speaking about music - I’m not qualifying friends the people you’re counting by thousands on a Myspace page.

Thus said, you also should know about me that I’m posting regurlaly on this blog about the music I love. And to be honest with you, I have to confess that I choose to be part of the YCD website to write a review about an amazing artist - and now a friend of mine : Colby Stead.

It’s been about 6 months that we’ve started blogging about music we love, and I didn’t find the right words to express the emotions I felt about his music. Thinking about the reasons, I’ve postponed this review multiple times, I’ve finally come to the conclusion that it’s because I’ve never met a human begin such as Colby. Sure, I was first seduced by his music, then by his words, eyes and thoughts then by his unique way to progress in his own life, not only as a songwriter but as a single unique human being.

Choosing to write songs as a medium to express his feelings it gives everyone who wants to listen the opportunity to discover an artist, part of his personality. So, if Trini could write a couple of lines above given the chance as such, then I wish to take mine and try to share with you a simple conversation with Colby. It was supposed to be a regular interview, but as I’m not a journalist, and Colby is neither a common singer, the following transcript translates what could be called without any pretension : A conversation.

Olivier : I would like to know about your process, the advance of being a singer songwriter ?
Colby : I started as a drummer. My friends started doing drugs and I started playing the drums. Drumming was/is a very physical instrument. Perhaps I liked the physicality of the drums because athletics–and the movement of my body–were very important to me at the time? I spent many weekend nights alone drumming; establishing a relationship with rhythm, timing, phrasing and most importantly MYSELF. Inevitably, I played in a few bands, but soon realized that the dependancy of other musicians wasn’t easy for me. I found myself struggling to connect - rhythmically & emotionally - with the music I was playing. Even still, I had no aspirations of becoming a songwriter. That wasn’t until I was given an acoustic guitar as a gift…”
Olivier : For the musical part, but as a human being ?
Colby : Expressing myself has always been very crucial to my existence. Be it through conversation, relationships, nature, drumming, cooking, etc… For as long as I can remember I longed for a way to connect with others. Little did I know, I was really needing to connect with myself. It wasn’t until I wrote my first song, that I felt as if I truly did that. I had no ambition(s) of becoming a songwriter. I had never dreamt of standing on a stage…but it just so happens, that songwriting gave me a way of TRULY connecting with myself & others. Simultaneously.

Olivier : With 2 albums behind / around you, and many songs already written - more than 100 according to my sources - inspirations seems to be permanently around you.. Could you please tell us about this process… Common people are eating / sleeping / loving and you ‘ve got an extra primary needs : expressing ?
Colby : You’re right, inspiration is all around us (children growing, trees falling, the sun shining), but the inspiration is also WITHIN us… When I sat down to “write” my first song there was no paper on wood. There was no pen in hand. There was only me, a guitar and the endless emotions, ideas, thoughts & experiences running through me. No, they weren’t running, I was running!
I don’t know how other songwriters search their souls & spirits to find the songs they create… When I am creating a song, I don’t feel like I am searching for anything. Rather, I feel the songs are searching for me. When the subject is painful the song stalks me slowly; attacking me when I least expect it! I try to run towards a safer place, but it’s no use. The memory or feeling finds me and I am forced to look deeply into the eyes of reality… Other times when the song is brighter and more “positive”, it politely taps me on the shoulder and lovingly takes my hand. Together we walk whispering words of hope and promise.

Olivier : Do you qualify your songwriting as a kind of cure ?
Colby : I can only hope that others might empathize with the songs. “Me too” or “I understand what that is like.” I believe only an individual can heal oneself, but I DO feel there are many motions in the healing process. Perhaps my music is one of the many steps towards their personal healing. …I hope so.
Often, I’ve been told… “Colby, you’re songs are so sad.” I can’t help but ask, are the songs sad? Or are YOU sad?

Olivier : The song ‘No’ titling and closing your second album as ‘Don’t Folllow me’ on your first record are two beautiful dark pieces that are both full of doubts ? Is it part of your creativity process : Is doubting a kind of rebirth ?
Colby : “Don’t Follow Me” is meant to be an honest admittance. Often we look up to artists and musicians in vain. I felt it important to admit that I am nothing special…and if admitting that MAKES mne special, then so be it. Overall, I think the song is very hopeful. Forcing one to accept the responsibility of their choices. As for “No”. I often feel stranded in my own mind, body & spirit. To me, “No” is an S.O.S. (Save Our Spirits) to any one else stuck on the island of themselves…
It was written sitting beside a candle in a large bathroom on the wooden side of a copper bathtub. A dimly lit room for a dimly lit song. Hope, like the flame of the candle, flickers…

Olivier : This going to be a really personal… So, i’m not sure this will be published… Are you optimist about the world we live in ?
Colby : So much of my music is personal. It’s taken me a long time to be comfortable with that. But meeting people such as yourself helps. Publish ANY DAMN thing you want. That is one of the many beautiful things about music. It leaves so much space for interpretation…
Someone that has been sexually abused that hears a song written about that subject, is bound to find peace in the brutal subject matter. Releived that someone is sheding musical light on such a dark issue… However, someone that HASN’T been abused, will just say the song is sad. So much of our existence on this planet depends on our circumstance(s).
Colby :…optimistic?
Olivier : Yes I suppose or you would have choose another way…
Colby : If we can begin to understand and accept others then I beleive things WILL eventually (and slowly) get better… But if we continue to NOT understand and accept others I don’t think there is much hope.

Olivier : Sorry I have been writing 40 times the same question… Is facing your new songs to an audience helping you saving your soul ?
Colby : Most of my self discovery comes while creating the song…not performing it. When sharing such a personal side of myself, I learn a lot about those listening… However, sharing DOES create a relationship of sorts…and in a way that soothes my soul. I’ve been approached many times after performances…and the reaction depends on the individual. I feel the songs I share give the individual a chance to fully accept and embrace where they are in their life… Some approach me crying and we instantly embrace. Others ask me a technical question about my guitar cable. Either way, it is personal and I value those interactions sincerely.

Olivier : You’ve been touring this summer accompanied with an accordionist… you’re playing many instruments… Is your music going to evolve from this great acoustic trio we used to (vocal, guitar cello) to something different ?
Colby : Not any time soon. Anyone that has played any instrument with another person knows; it is a relationship. Investments of trust, time, energy and emotion take a lot of effort from all those involoved. I feel very fortunate to be so close to my cousin (who plays the cello), my sister (who sings harmony) and my friend Amy (who plays the accordion and also sings.) Friendship and understanding comes before the music. I can’t imagine trying to have one without the other… I hope to one day record and release a bigger production, but not until I can afford to do so…
But to answer your question, I DO hope my music continues to evolve… I beleive it will IF I–as a person–continue to evolve. Change isn’t a comfortable process and I realize that I may never have the strength to do it. Or the talent!

Olivier : From ‘No’ to ‘So Normal It’s different’, 3 years passed, do we need to await such a long time to listen your next release ?
Colby : I hope not! I would like to release an album (or more) a year… but I have to make sure there is an audience for those recordings.

Olivier : What could help you the most ?
Colby : I am a controlling person, so I haven’t ever asked for much assistance. Now I am to the point with my music that I could truly benefit from some help. Don’t get me wrong… I’ve always had endless amounts of support.
But I’ve never had a manager, or a booking agent. I am grateful of the path I have choosen. I wouldn’t trade the lessons I’ve learned, or the songs I’ve created for anything… But I want to keep growing…both as a musician and a person.

Olivier : What are the biggest obstacles you feel a singer/song writer faces today?
Colby : Intention(s). Not just with singer songwriters, but with artists (and people) in general. Why do I want to make a living playing music? Why do I want to raise a family? Why do I want to go to church? There are so many different reasons to do what we do. I feel it is very important (and difficult) to ask ourselves why… Realizing what we truly want in life isn’t an easy process. Constantly it changes and can often become distorted. When we start creating art, children and or religions for others instead of ourselves…
I beleive it makes for a giant disconnect.
Olivier : But the path you’ve choosen to follow is a true communication process…
Colby : You’re absolutely right. Maybe that’s why my process is slower than majority of artists. In my experience communication takes time and trust.
Sometimes years and hours of conversation to begin communicating about things that REALLY matter.

Olivier : What’s your project for the coming year, Colby ?
Colby : …You’ll be impressed. I finally have a marketing plan!! My marketing plan is to market.
Olivier : ?
Colby : That’s right. I don’t feel that I have ever fully marketed my music on any serious level. We once had over 200 people come to a concert and we didn’t even hang up fliers. 2008 is going to be different. I feel it is time to take a step outside of my safety zone!
Olivier : Do you really mean that your previous attitute was a kind of self-protection ? Against who ? you ?
Colby : I think subconsciously it was. Perhaps against myself…perhaps against the scary, cynical world!
Olivier : Critics ?
Colby : Not just that… I don’t know if enough will ever be enough, but it comes down to one thing.
Colby : Do I want to share my music?
It’s taken me a long time to answer that question.
Olivier : What do you mean with ‘I don’t know if enough will ever be enough…’
Colby : My voice, the songs, my guitar…
Colby : Just good old self doubt.
Olivier : So you don’t listen carefully your friends ? or don’t trust them ?
Colby : I think it is more about trusting myself. I’m beginning to do that more and it has helped my friendships greatly.
Olivier : It’s not an easy path I agree…
Colby : Like attracts like. When I feel better about myself…I find others that feel better about themselves too.
Olivier : But you’re not choosing facility…
Colby : No Way! It’s just like hiking a mountain… There is no easy way to the top, but once you are there… All the pain and challenge(s) were well worth it.
Olivier : if a top ? a never ending quest.
Colby : EXACTLY! I am enjoying my slow journey to the top of my musical mountain…
Olivier : carpe diem ! sorry stupid….
Colby : No. The day is the moment and if we can seize either one of those, that is saying a lot! I’m sorry to answer with so many words. It might be difficult to make any sense of it all

Olivier : What’s on your stereo at the moment ?
Colby : I’m listening to Virgínia Rodrigues … have you heard of her?
Olivier : Never…
Colby : She’s Brazilian . I don’t understand a word, but the music touches me very deeply. For the past week she has taken me to a place that I needed to go.
Note : Colby sent me a sample - a song called “Salvador Não Inerte”
Olivier : The song is simply delicious !
Colby : ..with no words and or meaning. just melody, grace & wonder.
Olivier : Grace exactly ! Music is a great medium to travel !
Colby : I agree my friend. I agree.
Olivier : Through moods, lives, countries, experiences, feelings…
Colby : Perfectly said.
Olivier : Sometimes it’s dangerous… so easy to listen.. that you can forget to live your own trip!
Colby : Very true. That’s part of why I started writing my own “songs” …to further complete my journey
Olivier : That’s a good reason.. I wish i find time to write mine too…
Colby : Not all of our songs are sung the same way…the important thing is that they are sung at all…this is something I am trying to learn.

Olivier : You’ve recently updated your website, with some new videos : a serie called ‘The documentaries’ composed of 8 videos / interviews. What’s your idea behind ?
Colby :…I never put too much forethought into making these movies. A friend lent me a video camera, so I thought I would spend some quality time with it. I can’t truly express how special these interactions were for me. I learned so much about them, and more importantly, myself…
I strongly believe that we are ALL very unique. Who would have thought that a man irrigating his lawn would be interesting? It goes to show, that if you ask someone sincere questions and listen with an open heart and mind, then beautiful things will come from it. That is what I did with all of these individuals; It just so happens, I was holding a camera at the time.
For each video I wrote a song. All of the songs were written while I watched the video footage being imported onto the computer. The words, the meaning and the melody were written much like a musical score.
Olivier : What’s about the editing process ?
Colby :I did that much like cooking a meal. Following my senses. Trying to simplify the ingredients/footage, so to create something beautiful (and meaningful.)
Olivier : The Artist documentary contains one of my favorite audio track in the series ? Could you please tell us about this song ?
Colby :”Ashamed” is a song about the inevitable fear of exposing your expression (musically and or visually)…
It’s easy to walk by a painting criticizing it’s color and its life. We have a tendency to discount what the artist has gone through to create that painting.
The same can be said about music : songwriting is the canvas for my emotional paint. It gives me a specific amount of space in which to create & express myself.
Olivier : Than you for the song. Thank you so much for this conversation.

Ashamed - Colby Stead [3:43m]: Play Now | Download